True Stuff that I Made Up

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Further, this website is devoutly dedicated to all of my friends and associates, both early and late, who have mentored and influenced me. However, being who they are, the majority of them have been late most of the time.

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Thursday, November 06, 2008

Here Are Your Assignments

Ignore the first five people who say "good morning" to you.
Phone a stranger and say, " I can't talk right now. Bye!"
Shout random numbers while someone is counting
Walk into a very busy person's office and, while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off at least ten times.
For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as "Bob." The tell them that Bob's your uncle.
Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have to go do a number two."
In a meeting or crowd, slap your forehead repeatedly and say, "Shut up, all of you just shut up!"
Repeat the following conversation ten times to the same person: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now!"
During a meeting, slowly edge your chair towards the door.
Arrange toy figures on the table to represent each meeting attendee, then move them according to the movements of their real-life counterparts.
Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won! 3rd time this week!!!"


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